You may find this hard to believe, but of every location in this country we could live, I’ve chosen Madison, Wisconsin. (See my previous post on planning to stop traveling.)
I swear, I’ve been thinking about a landing place for about three years. Everywhere on this map, we’ve stayed at least one night and we’ve looked around and probably grocery shopped and had a beer, so we haven’t just stopped everywhere, in a way we have lived everywhere.
And, everywhere has its pros and cons, of course. I thought I wanted to live at the beach, but either houses are expensive in popular places, or small places are so small we’d lose our minds after a month. They’re all buggy. In the South many people are very conservative, and I mean very. The East Coast is packed with people, no matter what persuasion. The Southwest is hot, all the time. The Pacific Northwest is wet, all the time. California is expensive and far away. I could overly simplify even more regions, but I’ll just get myself into trouble with y’all.
My point is that the more I thought about location, the more I realized that place is no longer the deciding factor to me. What’s important to me by now is society, fellowship, giving back, friends. For that, I could start over somewhere with a high ranking of friendly people, but I’m tired of being the stranger. So I should go where I already know people. Seeing as how I can’t make myself go back to the interstates and sprawling cities of the East Coast, that leaves only a few places.
I do know three couples in Madison. I have been there three times (maybe not a lot, I know) but I really enjoyed it. It’s liberal and somewhat diverse and funky. It has what you need in a city (hospitals) but a lot of the urban neighborhoods are each like a small town: walkable, bikable, interesting. It’s got a large and respected university (Tracy went to grad school there, and Finn’s international research program is based there). It’s got good local beer. And, after witnessing so much entitlement across the country, I’m ready for some Midwest humility. Politeness.
Yes, the winters. I’ve been trading daily snapshots with my friend Doug who lives there, and “dismal” does not seem like an overstatement. But, truth be told, for five years I haven’t known what season it is, so I’m okay with seasons again. I lived in Montana for a couple of years; I should be okay with Wisconsin.
Frankly, after looking for so long, I simply had to pick a place, and when I said “Madison,” it felt good.
Now, finding a house is going to be tricky, much less starting over from scratch, entirely—and we have other constraints I’m yet not blogging about. So, the nomad story isn’t over yet. Hang in here with me; I’ll be able tell you more soon.
Howdy, neighbor-to-be!
We only visited Madison twice before committing, and the first time only lasted 18(ish) hours, but you know what? Not a single regret. Looking forward to seeing you guys once in a while!
I’m looking forward to that, too! If our route had been a tiny bit different yesterday, we’d have brought you fresh curds. Because you WILL see the difference!
We will have to come visit you and have a reunion with Doug too!
This is Bik actually. I forgot to log in.
I support more Bik visits!
That would be so nice if you did, Bik! I’m sure I’ll make it to Chicago at some point, myself.
Admit it, you’re moving there to be closer to Mark.
Never having been to Wisconsin I’ll have to take your word about its attributes, but they all sound perfect. And if you’re happy? I’m happy.
The idea of starting from scratch again must be a little daunting, but it can also be a wonderfully fresh adventure. Good luck with the house hunting… be sure and take us along.
😉
I have a mission to get Mark to appreciate fresh cheese curds, so I figured I should just move to his town to complete that mission. 🙂
Seems a bit extreme, but if you feel strongly about it…
😉
I’d never really heard of Wisconsin until I read Mark and Shelly’s blogs. Now I’m thinking I’d like to move there. I think CheeseGov’s population development team need to get more bloggers on board.
I can’t say I’m ready up give up Maine, but they’ve done wonders for Wisconsin’s general appeal… I agree.
😉
I’d like to be a city girl, whereas Mark is a land baron. We shall balance each other out.
Ah… interesting.
I don’t know if you’ve blogged about settling down before, but to me, this sounds like huge news. I’m a few years in after moving to a new community. Making friends is hard. I have quite a few acquaintances, and potential friends. Lack of time and energy due to work is the limiting factor for me. I can’t wait to hear more from you!
I hear you about having a hard time making friends, and I’m sorry. My struggle to make this decision I’ve pretty much kept to myself because my husband so does not want to settle down. It got to the point where I just couldn’t deny my feelings about it, though. Stay tuned for additional huge news, if that’s what you subscribe for, ha!
Be patient, be kind to yourself, and know that it all works out in the end. I’ve so enjoyed being on this journey (vicariously) with you and Tracy!!
Thank you, Cyndy! People keep telling me that it’ll all work out in the end, but man is it going to take a lot of juggling to make it “all work out”! Thanks for the good advice throughout.
I loved Madison for grad school, and I definitely see why it would be your choice. Winters ARE harsh, but made bearable by the fact that people get up and about and the public services are excellent, clearing the streets very quickly even after two feet of snow get dumped on you.
That said, I think you may have sold the Southwest short by not considering places in the mountains. Taos, where I have a house, never really gets unbearably hot or cold; and has unbelievable scenery and options of things to do. It also has a liberal, educated community of refugees from many places. Where Madison does dominate is in health care; I won’t lie, it is the one thing that keeps me from just pulling the trigger and living in Taos year-round.
Congratulations on making your choice!
I do love the landscapes of New Mexico! It just seems foreign to me, too foreign, I guess. Whereas the trees and birds of Madison are familiar enough to this East Coaster. And quality healthcare, three cheers for that.
Not sure why this came up as anonymous. I’m Mark Kennet.
My commenting system is often wonky. No worries, I knew it was you!
Wow, that is big news.
Thinking of you two, hoping healing is going as expected.
A well thought out idea. Madison has so much going for it, and a friendly, welcoming place. Relatives/friends in WI sing its praises. The annual precipitation is about the same as Seattle, while some areas in Wa in the rain shadow of the Olympic ranges have far less (e.g., Sequim, that has mild winters and is a magnet for retirees). The reputation for being too rainy serves the PNW well; it stems the influx of new residents. Ironically, Seattle gets less precipitation than many major cities: DC, Atlanta, Houston, etc. It just does not come down in big storms; more of a lingering grey. But no artic winter (we get one ‘arctic’ week per year. Madison does though sound liek a solid choice.
Man, the Pacific Northwest has so much to offer! That temperate climate, the groovy vibe … And it not being on everyone’s radar is a big draw. I lived in Portland for only a year but got a glimpse. Still, in Portland, at least, the grey skies about did me in.
Congratulations Shelly and Tracy on your decision! That is awesome. Lucky for Madison to get you two travelers. I saw your comment about the beauty of New Mexico being a bit to foreign – I have felt the same about the desert and some of the the southwest – Like you after living in verdant ole Virginny or east coast cities my whole l find that the lack of a dense green scape is hard to overcome. But still much to explore – inland California and Colorado etc – so many factors to consider but cool college town seems the way to go. Madison looks great and you can migrate in the winter if need be. We want to check out Chico California (speaking of Dead songs) and a few other inland towns that are more reasonably priced – Flagstaff looks interesting but may be pricey- wondering if you made it through there?
I am guessing at who this is based on your use of “ole Virginny” but it’s just a guess! We did not explore Flagstaff with the idea in mind of settling there, but water rights are a big factor in Arizona, I do know this.